What do Pablo Picasso, Mick Fleetwood, and (maybe) your child have in common?

Last summer, my husband and I had a long car trip and rather than listening to 12 hours of radio, we took a break and listened to a few TED talks.  If you are not familiar with these, TED was started in 1984 as a way to spread ideas about Technology, Entertainment and Design.  It's website lists it as a platform for spreading ideas in short powerful talks that are 18 minutes or less.  TED

One of the talks that stuck with me that day was by Sir Kenneth Robinson on Education.  Video of Robinson's talk I couldn't recite the entire speech, but some of his key ideas stuck with me.  So much so that 4 months later on a phone conversation with a close friend about her children's different learning styles, I found myself recounting his story about Gillian Lynn, the famous choreographer.  Later that day, I was on Amazon ordering his book The Element .  And since that book arrived, I have found the content to be the topic of conversation with my children and husband on a daily basis.  Enough that I felt like sharing…

In short, Dr. Robinson begins by discussing how our current education system only feeds a certain type of brain, a certain type of student, and misses the mark on creativity.  He gives countless examples of highly successful creative people that were not nurtured in the traditional educational parameters.  The stories are amazing, and heartbreaking.  He describes a little girl whose school(and perhaps parents) think she has learning disabilities that would require her to go to a special school.  He describes a young man that envisions his adult life working in a tire store so that he can write stories and draw pictures at home on the weekends.  And he describes a teenager so frustrated that he leaves the school building to sit outside under a tree and pray to God to get him out of this place.  As a parent, this is the real eye opener.  These kids could make good grades…they just hated it.  And because someone along the way gave them a chance to use their talent, once that passion was encouraged, they were able to work hard and put in the time needed to become GREAT.  I am not going to spoil the book but the young man under that tree was Mick Fleetwood(later of the band Fleetwood Mac) and if you don't believe he needed to be drumming, not Algebra, then spend an awesome 5 minutes enjoying this Tusk video

Six decades prior to Mick Fleetwood's agonizing school experience, another creative genius was plugging his way through a miserable bout with the education system in Spain.  Pablo Picasso is quoted on Biography.com as being sent to sit in the "calaboose", a whitewashed bare cell with only a bench to sit on for being a "bad student".  He remembers taking a pencil and notepad and drawing during this confinement and remembered later that he "could've stayed in there all day".  Luckily for Picasso, his mother had detected his drive and determination early on and told him, "If you become a soldier, you'll be a general.  If you become a monk you'll end up as the pope." In an interview he declared, "Instead I became a painter and wound up as Picasso."  In short, he became who he was supposed to be.  He found the point where his passion met his aptitude and because that was who he innately was destined to be, he spent the rest of his life painting prolifically and challenging the boundaries of art as we know it.

Wow!  To be that parent that sees that their child is gifted beyond what we take for granted! To have the nerve to send a 16 year old to London to play the drums or to celebrate the little artist sitting in the calaboose!  I am not advocating throwing away the current education system as we know it but I am advocating the celebration of those kids who do not fit in the one tiny little box that society has allowed to be "acceptable".   I had a conversation just last week with a friend who told me that she wanted to be an interior designer when she grew up.  Her father told her that if she was going to college she needed a real major.  She became an accountant and described her 10 years working as an accountant as feeling like "someone was pulling her fingernails out".  When she was first married and moved into her first little house, her father came to visit and complimented her on her great decor literally saying, "You should do this for a living!"  Wow again!!

I am advocating listening and observing and hopefully celebrating your child's talents and differences.  As parents we have daily opportunities to guide our children.  One of my greatest fears is that I, in all my well-intentioned parenting, manage to miss that "a-ha" moment.

To Market, To Market….

What's for dinner?

How many times have we had this same conversation? 

How many times have you stared into a seemingly full pantry or refrigerator and drawn a complete blank? 

Or even wandered around the grocery only to come home with $300 worth of groceries but you are missing 2 things you need for tonight's recipe?!?

I am embarrassed to say that it took me WAY TOO LONG to devise a system to combat this….BUT now I have a plan. 

I like to cook and several years ago we started voting on new recipes at dinner.  If I tried something new from a cookbook or a magazine they would vote on whether or not that particular meal was a “Keeper”.  Then, there were years where I ran to the grocery 3-4 times a week because I was always forgetting items or didn’t buy quite enough.  Then, as my children became teenagers, they were starving and I had either not made enough for dinner or not planned ahead.  All that lead to this system.  

On Monday at breakfast, I print out a list of the Keeper meals(breakfast, Lunch and dinner) and they each get to highlight 2 of each meal and that is also their chance for special requests(shampoo, toothpaste, some special snack for their lunchbox).  It is important to note that the list of possible Menu Plans is always growing.  If you try a new recipe or have a great dinner- add it to the list along with all your family favorites.  This is just a helpful way to jog your memory and allow the rest of the family to add their opinions.  
Meal Planner

From that, I fill out the Weekly Menu Plan complete with main dish and side dishes and salads for all the meals.  If we know we will be gone for a meal, I list that as well.  
Weekly Menu planner.pdf

Then, using the Menu Plan, I make my grocery list(divided up by areas of the grocery store).

Shopping list.pdf

Trust me, this may take you 20 minutes at home but it will save you time at the grocery and countless hours not going back to the grocery during the week!  In addition, it is easy for me to look at the menu plan and say- “I’m going to cook extra chicken to use the next day or They can take leftover barbecue pork on rolls for lunch the day after we have it for dinner.”  NO, this is not rocket science but it works.  

Now, be flexible, you have all the ingredients for your meal plan in the house.  If you don’t want Chicken Enchiladas tonight- switch Tuesdays dinner with Wednesdays. Also, I still shop sales at the grocery.  If pork tenderloin are on sale, get a couple and work them into future meal plans.  

I know I know- you now think I'm a grocery nerd BUT this works for me.  Maybe you have a better plan, but this is a place to start for those of you that need a little direction in the dinner department.

Sunday Morning

Sunday mornings should be relaxing.  And whether your Sunday soundtrack is Etta James video 1 or Maroon 5 video , everyone should slow down and enjoy the paper and a good breakfast before rushing around to get ready for church or whatever else you have planned for the day….

Sunday Morning French Toast

Ingredients

Leftover French Bread(about 1/2 loaf)

4 eggs

2 cups milk

1 tsp vanilla

1 tbsp sugar

Slice the french bread into 1/2 inch slices.  Place in a 9x13 baking dish.  Beat eggs and milk and add vanilla and sugar and pour over bread.  Let sit at least 30 minutes, flipping if necessary, the bread should be soggy.  If you want to do this as part of a Saturday night clean up just cover the baking dish with plastic wrap and leave in the refrigerator overnight.  Heat a buttered skillet on medium or an electric skillet to 300 degrees.  Cook slices on each side until brown about 3 minutes(try to only flip once and allow the toast to rise). Serve with syrup or jelly.

Give Thanks!

You never know what will inspire a 14 year old.  This week, with no hurricane days to make up, my children were home Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday….so they got to help with more Thanksgiving preparations than usual.  I asked my daughter to help with setting the table.  The idea of tree rounds to hold the candles(very exciting considering we were discussing saws and drills) morphed into "family tree" place card holders.  She woke up Tuesday already thinking about Ancestry.com.  We signed up for the free trial and quickly got to work.  Five hours later…we had unearthed at least two more generations of ancestors, World War I draft cards, Census records from the 1800's, and Birth and Death certificates.  Wow!  She got to see where my great grandmother was declared on the census by her family when she was only 3 years old and one family had listed their residence as The Looney Tavern! She even commented that our family has been a part of Mobile for over 100 years.

These are pictures of the beautiful place cards she made for everyone.  She took a bit of oak tree from the yard, spray painted it with some primer I had, watercolored some fall colors on watercolor paper to cut out leaves, put the branch in modeling clay to stand it up, wrapped that with some fabric scraps and hot glued the family names to each persons tree working back from their name up to their great grandparents.  

Not only is my table beautiful, but I think these are going to be wonderful conversation starters.  Hopefully on a day when we can be distracted by whether or not a recipe turned out or some less than perfect family issues, let us give thanks for those who came before us and made this country what it is--for us and those to come.

Teachable Moments

I am not a morning person.  I have tried it all-- getting up and exercising early, going to bed earlier, you name it.  So far the best I can do is COFFEE.  My children are polar opposites in the morning.  I have the early bird who is up and showered and dressed and at the breakfast table with a bright, happy face ready for conversation at 6:05am.  While the other comes downstairs at 6:25am, hair dripping wet, quiet and hoping to not have to make eye contact or small talk for at least 30 more minutes- at least she doesn't growl at us any longer. 

However, a new phenomena has begun at breakfast.  After 12 years of plugging along, me fighting the urge to be the grumpy morning person I am, getting to school on time and in a ready to learn mode, breakfast conversation has become an important part of the time I have with my children.  We discuss their day, my meal choices for the week, sometimes the older sibling imparts some words of wisdom to the younger sibling, in short-- it has become fun.  And during these dark, lamplit-because-it's-still-dark-outside winter mornings, there are teachable moments.  Sometimes they are life lessons like how to deal with mean people, grumpy teachers or other social issues but sometimes they are more academic.

Last week, even though my choice of oatmeal for breakfast drew several groans, I served the oatmeal with lots of different topping choices:  brown sugar, pecans, bananas, apples, raisins, chopped dates, etc.  So while my children complained, they loaded the sweeter items of their choosing on top of the oatmeal to try to salvage their breakfast.  The dates spurred the conversation, "where do dates come from?".  With the help of a trusty ipad, we answered our questions.
They come from date palms

Date palms are typical to Northern Africa and Middle Eastern countries although they are being introduced in California

They are a staple of the North African diet

A typical date palm can produce 1,000 dates in bunches that weigh up to 18 lbs.

Leaving me feeling very fulfilled with the little nuggets of information I was able to teach with very little effort.

The next teachable moment came a few days later when our discussion of the XGames led to the question- "Why do they start so late?"  spurring a conversation about time zones. 
The XGames are held in Aspen, Colorado which is in the Mountain Time Zone.

What time zone are we in? Central

Which way does the sun come up? In the east

So where is it light first every morning? here

And some of the intricacies of how the business world needs to operate and the need for time zones.

Rest assured, these conversations did not any where near cover in full the topics we discussed BUT the quiet time we spend at the table has provided the opportunity.  The opportunity to share questions and answers, teach them to be inquisitive and seek information, and to know that there mother will TRY to help find answers to everything from life's problems to why the sky is blue. 

Heaven Preserve Us

 Childhood memories run through my head like snatches from movie trailors, sometimes happy, sometimes sad, anxious, uncomfortable or in the best ones, warm syrupy memories that wash over you and bring a peace not easily attainable in adulthood.  I grew up in Kentucky, a displaced Deep southerner, both my parents being born and raised in Mobile, Alabama.  I remember thinking it odd that my mother had to have the “right kind” of grits mailed to her since the local Kroger’s, a rather large grocery chain, did not sell them.  Apparently any self respecting Southerner knows that instant grits simply do not stand up, quick grits are the best, and the ones in the blue box with the Quaker man are preferable.  My summers were spent running barefoot in the backyard, neighborhood softball games and trips to Alabama to stay with my grandparents. 

        My grandparents had, and still have in their 80’s, a love of the outdoors.  Not the kind of outdoors with steep rock faces and rushing rapids that seem to be more in vogue today.  They love the back yard, with its lush soft beds of St. Augustine grass, neatly edged beds full of beautiful blooming impatiens, vinca, ziennas, the new plants Mama Dot had found at the nursery to experiment with this year, and always a well tended beautifully productive garden.  These were never monotonous, boring vegetable gardens.  We were always allowed to choose new things from the seed catalog to try out new types of tomatoes, new “burpless” cucumbers, beans growing on trellises, and occasionally my optimistic grandparents would plant strawberries or watermelon seeds from our afternoon snack.  Sometimes Mama Dot and Grandpa’s rows were perfectly weeded dirt rows with mulch running down them and in other years the rows were narrow strips of dirt with grass runners to walk down so that our feet didn’t get so dirty.  All aspects of the back yard had to be watered, weeded, mowed and groomed to perfection in the morning. That way, by the time the heat of the day combined with the high humidity and made those wonderful afternoon thundershowers, we could sit on the cleanly swept backporch in the swing, lower those big rolled up bamboo blinds so the rain didn’t come up on the porch, and enjoy the cool breeze that came with the rain. 

        Now I am grown, I have children that I feel need to have memories like this, things that we as modern consumers with more disposable income seem to delegate away.  We buy “homemade” preserves at the grocery and farmers markets, we have landscape services that rush in in a flurry and clean up the yard so fast my children may never know what a weed looks like, and sprinkler systems set on automatic timers.  But sometime in January when the cold is creeping into your bones and the days seem gray and it seems like spring will never come, the satisfaction that comes from pulling a Mason jar out of the cabinet full of summertime cannot be bought or marketed.  I got to help pick the cucumbers, tomatoes, and beans from the garden and was carefully and patiently tutored on the best size cucumber to pickle and when things looked their ripest. At the height of summer, we collected so many vegetables that they had creeped into bowls on the kitchen table, countertops and every meal.  It became common at my grandmother’s house to have sliced tomatoe with breakfast, lunch and dinner.  This is when the “giving phase” of the garden began, it becomes a practice like sending Christmas cards.  Anyone that has shown you a kindness or generosity you repay by gifting the fruits from the garden.  Some southerners only lock their cars to keep neighbors from leaving them more tomatoes.  After we had eaten and gifted our fill,  we canned.

         Cucumbers would soak in water with alum for 2 days, everything had to be perfectly prepared, and then the hard, hot(even in the air conditioning) job would begin.  Jars needed to be sterilized, pickles cooked with pickling spices, figs with sugar and lemon boiled till the sauce thickens, green beans and tomatoes blanched, and then the intricate pressure cooker, whose purpose remains a mystery to me, and you leave them to cool.  Leaving the tired cooks hoping and praying that when we returned, all the dots in the lids would be popped down(sealed). 

        I recently started canning, part hobby, part necessity because my family’s whole share at our local organic farm co-op was more than we could eat week to week and my sister in law bought a house with a rather large fig tree.  It is funny how things like hot, boiling water sterilizing Mason jars and the pungent smell of vinegar and pickling spices are bringing comfort to my kitchen and for me, are making my house more of a home. 

This Turkey tells a story

Several years ago I had the idea to incorporate a family tree into my Thanksgiving decorations.  I contemplated tying pretty craft paper leaves to a real tree branch and still think that would be a good idea but before I could decide, my children kept bringing home these pine cone turkeys from preschool.  I have always loved using their handmade things in my decorations so we came up with this Family Tree Turkey.  Ours is made from a pretty piece of brown crafting paper, using a ruler and a dinner plate I made the lines for the family lineage.  It is simple, children go on the "feather"  in front with parents above them.  On the back feather, grandparents go closest to the pine cone, with their parents above them, with their parents above them.  Set in the middle of the table, this is a great conversation piece for grandparents and children.  I was sadly amazed at how little my children knew about our grandparents and greatgrandparents.  Every year, when I unpack this turkey it is a reminder to share those stories and to keep those loved ones alive with our oral history.  Take the time to tell the stories you loved to hear as a child and connect your children to their past.  And be thankful.

I made these with my sons third grade class of 18 students with no problems.  To simplify, I made the template for turkey head and feathers ahead of time and copied them onto 11 x 17 sheets of watercolor paper at Postnet.  The class wrote in their names and the names of their siblings on the semicircle at top right, then their parents went on the center spots of the spokes, grandparents next, then great grandparents.  Then we watercolored the pieces, cut them out and hot glued them to the pine cone.  It works best if you cut a small semicircle out of the feathers where they slide onto the pinecone.  This activity took about 1 1/2 hours in the classroom with me hot glueing the feathers in place for them.

Happy Thanksgiving.